What you didn't know......

Okay so this blog is to get some stuff off my chest because I have been dealing with some anxiety since my c-section. So I want to get my story out there. I know it probably could not be avoided, but I am tired of thinking about the what if's. I need to come to terms with what happened.............

My Mother came into town on the 7th of March, 2010.  I had been having prodominal labor for about a week now and was already getting the over due talk from the Dr.'s. My blood pressure was good, the baby was great, but I still felt like something was wrong. During a Biophysical sonogram the tech found a large Uterine fibroid sitting on the top of my uterus. They were a little concerned but not too concerned about it since I had the same one on my Uterus when I had Elizabeth over 3 yrs earlier.

The contractions that I was having actually hurt and were not like the braxton hicks that I had been having. So I started to think that maybe my body was getting ready for Abbi's birth, but in the back of my mind I was having doubts. For some reason they didn't feel right.......... And then that Tuesday the contractions did not go away. So we made our way to the hospital. I had a great medical team and I knew my comfort level would go up if I was there with them. I wanted an Epidural as soon as I could get one because I knew that my body fights against the contractions. It was what happened with my first birth. Instead of relaxing and letting the wave pass over me, I would fight with it. We got to the hospital and they hooked me up to the monitors. I was thinking that they were gonna be off the charts since they hurt worse than the pitocin contractions that I had felt before, but no......... they were little contractions that didn't even register. The Dr.'s told me they were still willing to wait for my Trial of Labor but that the Fibroid might be causing problems for my Uterus when it tries to contract. I talked it over with my Mom and knew that if I waited and the fibroid caused me to have a c-section, I would not have any help because she would be going home in a little over a week. I really wanted the vaginal birth of my dreams, but I just did not see it in my future. The contractions did not feel right. It felt like my body was fighting with them and I was only dilated to a 1. I walked around for a little bit and then decided to go ahead and schedule the c-section for the next day. Something did not feel right and I am glad that I listened.

We showed up for surgery about 6 am (which the Dr told us to but we were not even scheduled until 10am). So we got to go back for surgery first instead of waiting......... I felt better not being wheeled into surgery. I walked to the room, they let me get myself comfortable, and lets just talk about the anesthesiologist......... He was absolutely GREAT!!! My first epidural took 30 min to place and 3 pokes........... he had that thing in place before I even knew it. I layed down and was having conversations with everyone. They were all admiring my tattoos and asking questions. They were treating me like a person and not a piece of meat to cut open. This c-section was gonna be different............. and it was. Abbigail Jolee Gipson was born at 8:05am on the 10th day of March in the year of 2010. They held her over the sheet and I cried. The nursery table was on the right of me so I could watch them as they wiped her off. Jarod went over to get a better look at her and told me that she looked like me. (which is funny since EVERY SINGLE one of his kids look JUST like him) Jarod got to carry Abbi down to the small nursery area where they weigh and measure her. The Dr's let me know that the uterine fibroid was about the size of a grapefruit and that they were surprised that I didn't have any problems with it earlier. (but I was too drugged up to ask them to remove it........ that is the one mistake that I wish I could go back and change.) I was then taken to recovery where Abbigail was waiting for me to breast feed her......... I was so happy!!

The next couple of days were easy. Abbigail took to nursing like a champ, my pain management was good, and everyone was so happy that she was here. We went home after 2 days in the hospital on a Friday afternoon. I was walking and I was so happy that this surgery was SO much better than the last. The final day in the hospital I stood up and had just a pool of blood ruin my brand new PJ's.......... the student nurse that was helping to take care of me told me that she was gonna get the nurse because that didn't seem like it should happen. My nurse ignored her nursing student and told her it happens all the time. It was not charted and I was sent home with my baby. We were home about an hour later. Lizzy and Dallas were waiting on us with my Mom. My other kids were in school and would be home in about 3 hours. I sat in my chair to eat a grilled cheese that my Mom cooked me, joking with her and my husband as my baby slept in her bassinet. Then I had a huge clot about the size of a baseball come out (ruining another pair of PJ's). I went to the bathroom and called my Dr as I passed 2 more the exact same size. We were told to go to our hospital in town because I was hemorrhaging. We get there and I am the only patient in the ER. We waited for 3 hours, 4 pads, and a nap later before my husband went out to the nurses station to cuss them out. I guess I had turned a couple of shades of white and no one had noticed. The Dr came in and drew my blood, I was rushed down to radiology for a sonogram or ultrasound (everything is very fussy at this point), I don't even remember coming back to the room where the Dr told me that we could stay there and get blood (small hospital, not my Dr's, no thanks!!), or I could get transfered by ambulance to the hospital I was just discharged from. I wanted my Dr's! So we were then transfered and my mind is blank on the details Except that I was on oxygen but the EMT's never turned it on (I guess it was a good thing that I didn't need it!!).

My husband and father-in-law followed the ambulance and was there when I was being put in the trauma room. Abbigail was still asleep in her carrier through the entire stay in the ER. The ER doc examined me and then my Dr's came down to examine me. I had no pain medicine. They then manually removed 2 more clots and that is one thing I do remember. I screamed, cried, and begged them to stop. My husband was there holding my hands fighting back tear of his own. He said that I scared him cause he had never heard anything like that before. After they got done, a black man came to the door and told them that there was a white woman out front that wanted to come back and that she was scaring him............. My Mom had made it!! My mother-in-law went to stay with the kids so my Mom could come. My Mom does  get a little scary sometimes I guess! They transfered me to a room where they put me on pitocin, to help my uterus clamp down, and started to give me blood. It was a very bad night. But my husband says that it was a good thing that I can't remember it. He called my best friend Jay and told him what happened, so he drove to Amarillo.......... I can't even remember him being there. My memory gets a little unfuzzy in the evening on the next day. I told the nurse that I needed to get out of bed and I wanted the catheter removed. I stoped taking the pain meds every 2 hours and resumed the hydrocodones from my surgery. I started to get up and walk, got some food, and got to breast feed Abbigail for the first time in over 12 hours. They had been giving her formula for the time I was out of it. The nurses were amazed that I was up, but I could not lay down in bed any longer. Abbigail was so happy to have her boobies back!!

I was scheduled to be released the next Monday but that Sunday I spiked a fever. I had several veins blow from so many fluids being pushed. I took shots in the butt for 2 days. My brother-in-law worked in the surgery area of the hospital and had some really good connections. They sent up an anesthesiologist to get a line put in so they could give me some stronger antibiotics. By Thursday of that week my fever had pretty well disappeared and I was sent home that Friday.

 During the weekend I started to run a fever again and they set me up an appointment for the next week. I went to the appointment and they thought I had another blood clot so they tried to remove it. When they couldn't remove it and I was on the table screaming and crying, they decided to admit me into the hospital again. My friend Jay was in the waiting area asking about me since I had been in the back for a good 3 hours at this point. He took me across the street to the hospital and helped me with Abbigail until Jarod could make it to the hospital that night. I was then given more antibiotics by IV that had to be placed by an anesthesiologist again! I was so tired of being poked and prodded. I was just plain tired of being in the hospital. The new IV blew by the morning time and I was taken down to radiology for a PICC line to be placed. I was taken back to surgery for an exploratory pelvic exam under anesthesia. I guess they were tired of holing me down during the exams in the office!! They found that the blockage that they were trying to remove in the office was actually my cervix. It was swollen and infected. No wonder it would not come out!! I went home again on a Friday, this time with antibiotics.

They next Monday I went to use the bathroom and had something start to come out of my vagina. ( I know, TMI! But this is what happened) I called the on call doctors and they said that since I wasn't bleeding any differently that I could take my time and didn't have to come in right away. I got to stay at home one more night with my husband and had my preachers wife take me in the morning. My girl friend was driving in from New Mexico and would be there later that morning to stay with me. I wanted to keep Abbigail with me at all times. I had her with me during every stay in the hospital. I was wanting to breastfeed her and was determined to keep doing it. We went to the hospital where they told me that my uterus had prolapsed and they needed to do a hysterectomy. As I entered my room again, I had 2 doctors, 2 anesthesiologists, and 2 nurses waiting on me. They then placed a central line in my chest and gave me 2 more units of blood so that I could have the surgery on that Thursday. I had catheters placed in my ureters for the surgery so that they would not damage them. They removed my uterus and the fibroid. When I woke up I was in horrible pain. All night I hurt worse than anything I had ever experienced. I kept telling the nurse that I had to use the bathroom and that is when she noticed that my bag was empty. She shook it and I had a clot blocking it. She emptied my bag twice. I went home again on a Friday.

All together, I stayed 21 out of 26 days in the hospital, I got 10 blood transfusions, and I could not breast feed anymore. When they give you blood, they give you benadryl.  Benadryl drys out your milk supply. I milked myself every 2 hours trying to get the supply back up but never could get it back. I was broken and I had lost the one thing that was going to give Abbigail and me our bonding time!! I now have PTSD and anxiety issues. I am going to school full time. I plan to be a nurse. I apply for nursing school this fall. I plan to work as a labor and delivery nurse and/or post pardum nurse. Once my kids are able to take care of themselves, I was thinking about going in and becoming a certified nurse midwife. I want to be there for women so that they have someone that understands what they are going through!

Abbigail Jolee Gipson was born on 3/10/2010  at 8:05 in the morning by c-section. She weighed 6 lbs 9 oz. and was 19 and 1/2 inches long. She was the perfect baby to complete our family.